I Am Woke AF
“If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, Infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things thro’ narrow chinks of his cavern.”
I am woke AF.
As a woke AF individual, I have decided to embrace the minimalist way of life to save this planet that we all share and hold dear to our hearts.
Furthermore, I have decided that I do not have the right to take, as my own possessions, more then a small portion of this world’s finite resources.
I am ashamed of the greed I have demonstrated in the past and I will atone for my sins by becoming even more woke AF.
Now I know that all property is murder.
From this point onward, I vow to free all of the sentient beings that inhabit this universe by taking responsibility for the murders that I have committed, unknowingly, by owning too much stuff.
I vow to rid myself of all earthly possessions, except for my laptop, one frying pan, one spork, and my favorite towel. I will also save the planet by wearing only one set of clothing.
When I clean my one set of clothing, I will experience freedom from my clothing.
I will live in one cardboard box that I salvage from the dumpster down the street. I will not live in two cardboard boxes and support the excesses of modern fascist America.
I will discard the vile concept of commerce and eschew corporate capitalism by eating only things that are handed to me by kindly strangers.
I will poop in bucket and spread my “humanure” around the trees in the park.
I will not choose any gender, nor will I retain my name. I will fold my social security card into an origami crane and float it down the river, holding a small ceremony for the brutal, violent, and savage person that I once was.
Eventually I will subsist only on light and love and I will discard that outmoded means of communication, language.