I enjoyed your piece. I don’t know what it is about Medium today but I seem to be finding great piece after great piece. Firstly I wanted to point out that bellylaughs and orgasms are not all that easy to elicit from a loved one for some people, smiley face. Anyways, I wanted to sympathize with two of your points. The first one, where you talk about securitizing your life before allowing yourself to be happy and then finding out you don’t know how to do that. I have been there. It is such a strange place, in that logically you should now be feeling reams of joy, and in fact can’t feel anything. I think what that is is the realization that you just spent years of your life in preparation for something that is not even close to your calling/dream/passion. Time to start over. At least that, in part, is what I am doing. The other one, where you talkk about becoming comfortable with negative space as a Buddhist. I became a serious Buddhist when my friend killed herself and that negative space you speak of was slowly suffocating me, like the noose that killed her I suppose. I needed to know how to deal with silence and questions that have to go unanswered. In any case, thank you for your work.